What is about to follow is my inner thought process that I am just spilling into this post. It will not contain pictures. And may perhaps be boring. Nor will I proofread it for grammatical errors. But do please read nonetheless. Get a look inside of my mind.
Back in February of 2010, I began the journey of writing a novel. Now it is nearly October and I still have no finished product.
For the past week or so, I have been stagnant. Every time I try to write, I fail. And I mean fail. It is horrible and frustrating.
Last night I made the mistake of reading one of my old drafts. Honestly, I did not find it half bad, which was the mistake. Now the direction I thought I was going down permanently until the last sentence does not seem right anymore!
The story, though it has had several beginnings, still is the same one that I began in February. And you would think, that every time I start over, I would get disheartened. But with each new beginning comes a new realization. Oh, this character is supposed to do this! Oh, that is the moral of the story! Really, they are the bad guy!
I have written in total, about ten different drafts. I would estimate that in all that would add up to about 200,000 words.
That is not to say that each draft is a completely new design. The formatting is just tweaked. Thus, often scenes that I have written tend to make their way into another draft. Of course, not one of the drafts is past the first section of the story!
And now, I am at a stand still. I have my characters and I see their paths, but I cannot figure out how to ultimately get them there.
Here is my dilemma. I have three main characters. And I want each of them to tell their story somehow, but I am not sure how to go about this. My most recent draft was a completely new revision where I took another draft and put it into first person. The story has become now about a girl named Jaylee and her journey through the story. At first I really liked this. And in all, I think first person is a good idea. But now it is difficult to learn what the other characters know in a casual manner.
The story is not like a simple revealing of a gorgeous boy who is really a vampire. I am hoping it is a tad more complex than that. This is why I originally began it in third person. The different point of views seemed essential. Then again, I like the way that first person creates an added sense of mystery in the characters. It is limiting, yet more enticing in a way. Yet, slightly infuriating.
Here's the thing. I need to stop starting over. But here's the other thing. Right now I really like both ways of writing. I like the possibilities that I see in each. So I need to keep going, but I am not entirely sure with which one to keep going with?
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